The Muffin I Never Knew

A couple of weeks ago, I was having some back pain and I realized that it was near my kidneys. I was rubbing my back and thought it felt kind of swollen, so I pulled my pants down and looked at it in the mirror. I was horrified at what I saw. My back was SO swollen. I was in a bit of a panic, because I have hypochondriac tendencies, so I asked Jeremy to look at it. He kept looking as I was pinching and showing him all the "puffiness". I was like... "OMG, look how swollen it is!" He was like... "I don't see anything abnormal honey." I just thought he was being a guy and didn't notice the HUGE, PUFFY, SWOLLEN area surrounding my hips. I was a little insulted that he would insinuate that my back always looked like that.

Fast forward a week. My back pain had subsided. It felt better by the next day actually and nothing was wrong with my kidneys though I was terrified for a few hours that I had kidney cancer or possibly something worse. Anyway, I was looking in the mirror and had a painful realization. I have that whole muffin thing going on. I don't usually wear pants that are tight around my waist so I never have muffin TOP, but I do have the muffin. I had convinced myself that I hadn't been bestowed that womanly gift. It turns out that I have been wearing muffin blinders for years. Everyone has the ability to block out certain aspects of their body that they just can't come to terms with and apparently this is one of MY things. I mean, most of the time when I look in the mirror, I elongate my body so things look slimmer. I turn and look at myself from only the best angles. Who knew I was carrying such a soft pillow around my hips all these years? I'm still in shock.


P.S. I told Tammy this story and she laughed and told me to blog about it, which is why I did. This post is dedicated to her amusement. :)